A mess

I promise to start writing regularly again.
Life has just been a mess right now
Today I had a horrible day at work we just kept getting slammed with returns,
I lost ten bucks and spilt coffee on my white shirt.
Got home sat on the couch and my mom and dad walked up and proceeded to tell me
that My 12 year old cousin had just died.
I'm so distraught right now. I thought I was done with deaths and I dont
even know how to handle it.
I feel so just lost.
or numb I'm not sure
We all knew it was coming but it was so sudden..
I always figured that he would just get sick and then it would be a few months.
but my mom saw him about 4 days ago and said he didn't look too well
and then i guess he was just gone.
So when things are better
and more organized i'll have a fuller update.